38 pages • 1 hour read
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Olaf plans to smuggle the Quagmire triplets away during the auction the next day by hiding them in one of the objects and having his helper place the highest bid. The Baudelaires return to the penthouse, where they heat fire pokers in the oven so they can bring them down to melt away the bars and free the triplets, a process that takes a long time and makes them feel anxious. Finally, the pokers are hot enough to work as welding torches, and the children prepare to climb down the elevator shaft a second time.
When the Baudelaire children climb back down the fake elevator shaft, the triplets are gone. Klaus remembers that Olaf left a copy of the auction catalogue at the penthouse, and the children hurry back up to look at it and work out which object Olaf will hide the triplets in. While Klaus consults the catalogue, Violet and Sunny hide their rope and find a note from Jerome which says Esmé will bring them to the auction at 10:30, only a half hour away. Violet and Sunny hurry to the library, where Klaus turns a page in the catalogue to reveal an object called “V.F.D.” being auctioned, which seems “to spell out the solution to the Baudelaires’ problems” (175).
The children explain their findings and theories about Olaf to Esmé, who accepts it all with a disconcerting calmness and announces they will go to the auction house immediately to help their friends. The children are confused, but follow Esmé out of the penthouse, saying they should hurry and climb down all the stairs. Calmly, Esmé puts an arm around them, telling them they don’t need to take the stairs and that they’ll take the elevator. She pushes them down the elevator shaft, and the children land in a net strung up about halfway down, trapping them. Esmé has known the truth of Olaf and been working with him the entire time, and before she leaves for the auction, she tells the children how excited she is she’ll get their family fortune.
Sunny uses her extremely strong teeth to climb up the wall of the elevator shaft and retrieve the rope the children made. Instead of climbing back up, Sunny jumps down, and the three climb down, finding a hallway beside the cage. They retrieve their welding torches, now cooled, just in case.
After several twists and turns that wind under the city, the hallway lets out at a trapdoor under the ruins of their old home. Using their fire pokers as crowbars, the children pull the door open, Klaus excitedly announcing that “the solution was right on the tip of our tongs!” (211). A passing mail carrier runs away, thinking they’re ghosts, but the kids barely notice him, overcome with emotion at their location.
The ruins of their home are a short distance from the auction house, and the children arrive shortly before the object trapping the triplets will be auctioned. They find Jerome in the crowd and convince him to purchase the object for them as a gift. First, a giant statue of a red herring is purchased by the door man, and then a large cardboard box with air holes and the letters V.F.D. comes out. Jerome refuses to bid past a certain amount, and just as it seems the box will go to Olaf’s helper, Sunny shouts an astronomically high bid. The children win the box and tear it open, only to find it’s full of very fancy doilies (V.F.D.). The narrator identifies this as a red herring literary device, adding that the children unfortunately “did not realize it was a red herring until they looked around the stage and saw what the box contained” (242).
Appalled at the children’s behavior, Esmé wants them taken out of her care immediately. Olaf offers to take them, but before he can, he trips on one of the doilies and falls, causing his boots to fall off and expose the tattoo on his ankle that identifies him as the villain who’s after the orphans. Esmé and Olaf make a run for it with the children and auction attendees in pursuit, most of whom slip on doilies and fall. The children get outside in time to see the villains getting in a truck and driving away with the huge fish statue.
The narrator pauses here to tell the reader they can imagine a better ending than the one ahead and, that while he wishes he could make the sad ending pretend to be a happy one, he “cannot hide the unfortunate truths of the Baudelaires’ lives behind an ersatz happy ending” (254).
Jerome offers to take the children far away from their troubles so they can forget Count Olaf and the triplets. The children don’t want to forget, so Jerome relinquishes guardianship of them because he isn’t brave or willing enough to put himself in danger to help. The children don’t know what will happen now, but they know they can rely on one another “and this, at least, felt like the one thing in the world that was true” (259).
The latter half of the book shows the Baudelaire children continuing to use their skills to expose Olaf in ways that bend reality. The fire poker plan in Chapter 8 shows Violet’s ingenuity but also only works because of the nature of the novel. The novel employs satire and over-the-top descriptions to deliver its messages, and this extends to how the children solve their problems. The rope the children fashion to climb down the elevator shaft requires a suspension of belief—a theater and literary term meaning that one must choose to believe things that are difficult to accept. It is unlikely either that there could be enough material to fashion such a long rope or that the children could successfully climb down it in the pitch dark, but the events are accepted because of the story’s satirical nature. The narrative style, in being unbelievable, allows for a tone of humor that dissipates any true feelings of danger, though the Baudelaires consistently escape many perils. This storytelling is seen with the children’s other solutions as well, including baby Sunny’s ability to climb back up the shaft with only her teeth to rescue her older siblings.
The V.F.D. box at the auction serves as a red herring—a literary device typically employed in mystery novels—and a representation of The True Significance of Life. A red herring is a term that derives from hunting, in which red herrings, a kind of fish, would be dragged across a trail to trick dogs into following a scent. In literature, the term defines a clue that is plausible enough to work in the story’s framework but that ultimately points the reader in the wrong direction. The children are convinced the V.F.D. box Is the one they need, and they don’t realize the letters are a diversion until it is too late. At the auction, Olaf actually hides the triplets in a giant statue of a red fish, making the red herring literal. In this way, it is clear to readers who understand the concept of a red herring that the children have been fooled.
Believing the box to hold their friends, the Baudelaires are anxious to bid and secure the container for themselves. This concern illustrates how the siblings, while still children, understand the true meaning of their friendship and the danger that the Quagmires are in. In contrast, Jerome continues to be a static character lacking growth as he doesn’t want to spend past a certain amount of money. Regardless that everything in the auction is considered “In” Jerome is preoccupied with his money instead of what truly matters.
Chapter 10 outlines the novel’s theme of Bravery Inspired by Trustworthiness as the Baudelaires reach a turning point in the novel. Up until this point, the children have believed that the adults in their life care, if sometimes superficially. Esmé’s betrayal was foreshadowed by her meeting with Olaf, and the ease with which she traps the children shows she never really cared about them. Her cowardice is revealed in her targeting the children, and she illustrates how she is unworthy of trust as she listens to the children tell her about the elevator shaft’s connection to Olaf. Esmé’s calm acceptance of the elevator shaft story departs from her usual personality and hints to the reader that not all is well. Like with the red herring, the children don’t realize Esmé’s deceit until it’s too late, demonstrating how their trust in Esmé is unfounded. In their preoccupation with being trustworthy friends who are brave enough to thwart the adults who have taken their friends, they miss critical clues about how everything around them is not as it seems. Like Esmé, Jerome’s cowardice also harms the children, if in a less direct way. His timid nature means his solution to Olaf is to run away, showing how his cowardly response makes him also unworthy of trust. At the end of the book, Jerome walks away from the children, leaving them alone and showing how he is not trustworthy or brave.
The narrator plays a large role throughout the novel, and the purpose for the narrator’s participation can be seen in this section of the story. In Chapter 13, the narrator tells the reader to stop reading if they don’t want to hear the sorrowful ending to the story. This is a tactic the narrator uses at the beginning of the story, warning that things will get worse, and building the tone of suspense for the plot. The narrator’s warnings also serve as a way for the reader to feel more connected to the story, since the reader is directly addressed. The narrator brings the book’s title full circle as well, providing explanations where necessary to keep the text accessible for readers. Earlier, he defined “ersatz” in terms of the false elevator shaft and its role in the book as a decoy to hide Olaf’s plans. In the final chapter, “ersatz” becomes a metaphor for the novel’s ending, as well as for the entire series with the narrator’s revelations. As the series title suggests, the Baudelaire children face one unfortunate circumstance after another, and each book’s ending is as painful as the last. The narrator says he can’t hide the true ending behind an ersatz happy one, much like he cannot sugarcoat the misfortunes of the Baudelaire children. Their situations are what they are, and as is noted in earlier chapters when the children enter the dark building on Dark Street, things will get worse before they get better.
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